Rockies should replace Tooth Trot with local “South Park” race featuring Eric Cartman and friends

The Tooth Trot in Coors Field is tired, and lovers at LoDo are ready for something fresh at 20th and Blake.

No just did the Rockies borrow this idea from the Brewers, who have the traditional Sausage Race in Milwaukee, however they whiffed on character choice.

As Rockies beat author Kyle Newman wrote earlier this year, there are not any ties between teeth and “The Centennial State. ”

Yes, we know Comfort Dental is spending Monfort and Co. to sponsor this poor promotional race including Toothy, Fresh and Bristles… but today is the time for the change.

If done correctly, the Rox can dominate this kind of baseball and create national headlines in the process. The last team to do this was that the San Diego Padres when they released the Anchorman Race with Ron Burgundy.

The winner for Colorado is South Park, the Traditional Comedy Central cartoon created by CU alums Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

Yes, I’m speaking about Eric Cartman, Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski and Kenny McCormick working around the warning track in Coors since they vie for bragging rights 81 times a season.

With neighborhood ties and characters well know nationally would be a immediate winner in Coors Field.

They could even kill Kenny in the close of the race.

— Jeff Bailey, The Denver Post

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